Cheerleader Feedback

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I edited that first chapter. Finally. Do I hear choirs singing? No? I don’t think I deserve them anyway. I have been a bad writer. A slacker, but the good part is that I know what I want. That speeds things in a nice fashion, but I still have a lot to work forward to. I passed the chapter through the mandatory first read over at my Cheerleader and I heard the good, which is that I have good writing moments [in prose, in movement of scenes, in action], and the bad, which is somehow not so scary and terrifying at the same time.

I have used the Lost model to tell this chapter: alternation between present and past, between what my character is saying happened and what really did. I apparently did not make that go too well. I am sure to fix that. I even have a few ideas on how to hint to that in the beginning. This is the relatively easiest problem to fix.
I also went back to my old keep-it-to-myself mode, where I do not seem to tell much information to the reader. My cheerleader is confused. I will not have that. Since yesterday, I have been envisioning ways to add fleshy bits here and there, so not so much as a problem in on itself really. This is my usual stingy-on-information self [or scared-to-info-dump self?] and I needed my cheerleader to help with maintaining that part of me in check. So will add these changes, before I send these to my Mega Beta [or the Axe], his trained reader-ly eye will help me with plot, pacing and other elements.

The biggest fear is establishing a connection between the reader and the characters. So far the only one to dominate the pages is the protag and she is rather the rogue solo, quite unlikeable and cold. I need to woo my Cheerleader with some characterization. She gave me the benefit of the doubt [aka the second chapter] and I must not fail her. I think this one stems from the issue I have with other novels aka dump the life tragedy of the hero immediately, but I guess that serves its purpose with readers in general and that I am a snowflake in that regard.
I am ready to tackle.