[January 3rd] Scribblle Me This, The Writing Intentions

I have been thinking about the writing experience from 2011 and can say that I failed, when it came down to documenting my progress. Of course I don’t suffer from the illusion that I did all that much writing in the first place, but at the same time I can confirm that I’ve completed several flash fiction pieces, several short stories and one novel revision, which is not what a busy bee writer should have achieved. 

Oddly enough, this the title of this is "Writer's Block"

This year I start with better plans, because I believe that improvement lies within better time management, better understanding of how your life can take a turn for the worse [in terms of actual opportunity to write] or enter dead waters. Right now, I know the course of my year in a sequence of ‘green’ and ‘red’ zones right until July, when I’ll most likely graduate. If things go my way [and I get enrolled in a long distance Masters program], I’m pretty sure the rest of my year will be clear to me as well. Given all these factors, I planned for the following:

1. Complete revisions on “Crimson Anatomy” based on beta readers feedback in time for the Angry Robot open month as well as initiate an agent hunt, because it’s not all smart at all to place all your eggs in one basket. Project Timeline: January 1^st – February 29^th.

2. Complete revisions on “V is for Virus”, my futuristic super villain novel, which I’m happy to say is completed as a draft and pretty well sketched in my head, so I’ll have a very pleasant go at the revisions. Contrary to “Crimson Anatomy”, the concept for “V is for Virus” as well as the feel, the voice and the overall arc in the series have remained constant for more than a year, which is usually a good sign with me. Project Timeline: November 1^st – December 31^st. The reason for this particular timeline is because I will split the current draft into two and then have a go at writing my first 100,000 word manuscript, which oughta be hectic.

3. Start a new novel project. I’m indecisive as to which project to select. I’m tempted by the possibilities. It’ll be either my YA novel “Airboy”, whose first draft is not completed and not up to scratch at that [though I will probably have to speak to an architect to help me with the main mystery object], my high concept secondary world fantasy “White” or a retro-futuristic super hero tale of emancipation “Super Powered House Wives”. Project Timeline: August 1^st – October 31^st. This will have to happen after my European tour in late July.  

4. In general, I have written down to complete and sent to publication twelve short stories in 2012, one for each month, which I think is believable aspiration. I’m keeping tabs on three to four anthology projects at the moment, so that guarantees a third of this goal to be fulfilled. I think the main focus will fall on finishing “Lungs”, which is around 60% completed. I’m not happy with how “Rabbit Heart” turned out as a short story, so I see a novella potential in the premise. Project timeline: focus on March 1^st – Middle of May [final exam sessions begins at that point and I will be writing a thesis, so I don’t think I will have much time to consider writing anything longer].

These are the goals, which I know I can finish in ideal conditions. This means work, school and personal life remain a constant. Since they are ideals, I realize that I will manage around 60% of what I have planned, this meaning that I probably won’t reach “V is for Virus”, but it never hurts to aspire to great success, right.

This may make me appear slightly crazy [for more than one reason], but at the same time I’m curious. Do you have plans for your writing?           

[January 2nd] Onward, Fair Steed of a Journal

With the 2011 recap out of my way, I can truly focus on what is to come. As with every year, I have set expectations for myself high as ever. I believe that this body and mind of mine can do more than I’m doing with them, so every year I challenge myself, more mentally than I’d like, but I consider taking bringing my body into the mix as well. I’m aware that I will fail, I always do, but as a friend of mine says ‘shoot for the stars and you just might end up on the moon’. I’ve taken to this advice and even though I know that I probably won’t transform into my wish fulfillment character, I will end up achieving more than I would have chasing after this ideal of me.

I'm not sure why I'm including this photo; I guess I'm trying to say: Be afraid, be veeery afraid.

Some people know discipline firsthand, others bribe themselves with treats. I know that I will cheat either way, so overworking it is. This post will focus on the goals I have set myself for my blog.

1. I’m more than ever determined to blog on a regular basis. Last year has been scandalously quiet, which I can’t afford, considering that this year I’m getting serious about my career here, now, even though I’m without adequate material for submission, agentless [kinda obvious why] and rather a minor fraction of the sphere. The rest of my goals have pretty much to do with fulfilling this one as well as help me establish my identity.

2. Cover more books. I’ve been awfully out of touch with what’s been published and what is hitting shelves, so I’m more than ever ready to comment on books that I have bought, read, am reading or want to read. Knowing me, this will more often than not manifest in critique of the cover art, which is how a book engages me in the first place, more often than not.

3. Weird Wednesday. I think I’ve discussed this, but come this Wednesday I’ll do an official launch of my Weird Wednesday feature, which will be a yearlong review of The Weird, the monstrous tome edited by Jeff and Ann VanderMeer.

4. I’ve decided to revive the Culture of Bulgaria feature, where I’ll tackle the national beliefs, holidays and cultural traits, which I’m more or less a product of. This decision stems from my intention to better understand myself as a Bulgarian and reflects my interests in non-fiction, fiction reading and fiction writing.

These are my immediate goals, which I see as doable, until I graduate, which should happen by July this year. I’m counting the days, until I can part ways with my university, which has pretty much been a negative element in my life for the past four years. Once I have the whole bachelor thing behind me, I will see whether I can bring some more plans together, though I assume they will be nothing grand.

And what about you? Any ideas for reinvention?  

[January 1st] And in the Spring I Shed my Skin

NB: I know it's far from spring, but these lyrics from "Rabbit Heart" by Florence + the Machine sum up how I feel about New Year. 

I’ve waited for January 1^st to write my End of 2011 post, because I needed to have this year behind me, if I am to discuss it. Of course, I missed on yesterday, because I prepared my short story “The Woman Who Wanted to Play Miss Havisham” for submission to Pandemonium: Stories of Smoke. I’m excited, because this will be the first proper SFF story with Bulgaria as setting I am sending out to do the submission rounds. It gives me a great thrill to have written it and include some social commentary on my own.

Most of all I have wanted to wait until January 1^st to include this cheeky picture, which does a splendid job at summing 2011 and my experience with it.

 I’m also playing Lily Allen’s “Fuck You” to emphasize how thrilled I am to say a very literal ‘Fuck you’ to the past year.

Theoretically, 2011 should have been a good year for me. I’ve landed a long term job position with all the right benefits and most importantly, steady income to help my family move along. I’m extremely grateful for finding a place in my current firm. The money ensured that we not only needn’t have wondered how to provide all the basic commodities and pay bills, but that I could contribute to paying off debts my family had for the better part of the last decade. We are not completely in the clear, yet, but I can’t stress how relieving it is not to fear the days in the calendar.

I’ve seen my wonderful, talented, loud-mouthed, wise-cracking, tough-as-nails sister through her toughest academic year, the high school entry exams, which in Bulgaria creates a shadow economy of private lessons. This is so because the education system fails to prepare pupils for the exams, which is why parents are forced to sent children to private lessons. Sometimes the monthly total exceeds what the minimum wage here is. Fortunately, my sister had teachers, who understood our situation and charged less. Now, I’m seeing my sister through her first year in the high school of her choice and I’m relieved that the next five years will be quiet in general.

Because I have steady income, I allowed myself the pleasure to plan and after years of intense wanton I realized my dream to visit a convention, which turned out to be the best experience in my life as a geek. I felt insane to be amidst all the talented people at Fantasy Con and give a handshake to the numerous people I have made acquaintances with over Twitter. It’s been madness for me and I’m immensely proud that I planned this trip on my own, executed it on my own and did not get fatally lost in the UK, which right there at the end constituted a real possibility.

As you can see, some of the big things in life are improving, yet, all of the above, I did alone. I had to work on a full work day, care for my sister [including all bureaucracy surrounding her exams, taking her to her lessons, jumping hoops, checking her homework and be for her in all her moments], work towards my Bachelor in Economics and in the meantime devote myself to the SFF community by reading, writing, reviewing and joining conversations. I still have to do all these things alone. My mother has been working on the other end of the country, while my father has disappeared completely from our lives upon the divorce. It’s my grandparents, my sister and I with me being the only adult within the age to do most of the bills and be the parent figure in my sister’s life.

Sometimes I feel trapped by all of this. Sometimes I feel remorse for feeling the first, because I have weathered a lot with my family as a unit. There are ties that run deep, strong and more powerful than I would wish them to be, because they make the possibility of a fresh start all the more complicated. Between running between these two absolutes, I have come to loathe the job that I have. I worked in the customer care department as a call centre operator and the stress led to health complications I never thought I’d be subjected to, one of them being quite the weight jump. I’ve bloated. Severely. Thankfully, I switched departments and now I’m in office heaven with so many funny, filthy-mouthed and dirty-minded peers. However, because 2011 had to be awful, a quick succession of small scale disasters happened, which I’m afraid almost broke whatever was in charge of sanity. I’m getting better, but I have never stopped asking whatever the fuck runs the show ‘haven’t you had enough’.

It comes to no surprise to say that my writing, reading and involvement in the SFF society has been minimal. I closed Temple Library Reviews, because I felt burdened by the whole thing. As always, I came to see myself as not one to fit in that mould for I set out to achieve goals, which could not be reached given the nature of my efforts. 2011 turned out to be a year of endings spring saw me part ways with Apex’s The Zombie Feed, where I worked for less than half a year. I’m extremely pleased with the results I had promoting Mark Allan Gunnells’ novella “Asylum” and Paul Jessup’s novella “Dead Stay Dead”. However, I did manage to become an assistant editor to Bryan Thomas Schmidt’s anthology project “Space Battles”, which comes out next April, and have engaged on a new editorial position, though I’m not at liberty to disclose the complete details as of yet.

On the writing front, I set out to edit “Crimson Cacophony” [now “Crimson Anatomy”] and I did to the point that it has been sent to beta readers and have critique to carry me out through a new round of edits. Other than this, I haven’t achieved anything worthwhile in terms of new words written. Projects have been started, projects have been finished [less often that I would like to], rejected or not edited to be sent out to venues, though I’m surprised I even did all of this. I even have two short stories accepted, which ought to be released some time this year. 

My reading has been disorganized and purposeless. I can’t even track the books I have done. Once I closed Temple Library Reviews, I announced it the year of Reading Unwisely and I think that this is perhaps the one goal that I realized to the fullest of its potential. I have, even so, reviewed for Innsmouth Free Press, The Portal, Rise Reviews, Pornokitsch, The World SF Blog and contributed non-fiction for Beyond Victoriana.

This past year gobbled me up, minced me with its teeth and spat me out. Given my crap track record, I have no reason to hope that 2012 will be any better, but I have my hopes, I have my plans and I’m a firm believer in the power of change. Even if it is only a principal change, I revel in the moment, when in less than a fraction of a second 2011 ceases to exist and then it’s a brand new year. I don’t live so much for the promise of the year being better as I do to bury the corpse of the last year.

All that shit above, hey, that was last year. The calendar is burning in the hearth, the evil has been exorcised, the bad is forgotten, the hard drive has been defragmented and the good has been backed up for the shitty days of the Blue Screen of Death. So I’m happy, fresh and the awfully archaic naïve and hopeful person, who has no place in this world, but here I am and at the moment, I feel like 2012 will be like this:      

     Art by Tsvetka aka Ink-Pot

[December 26th] Post-Christmas Plan

With Christmas behind me [thank god], I can unlock my bunker’s hatch and see the sun [or an approximation of the sun; the weather is far from grand, but you get my point] without any of the unnecessary, forced cheer. While I do like the idea of Christmas and what it theoretically represents as a holiday, Christmas festivities have morphed into a vehicle for maintaining the appearance of satisfied, joyous family union to the point you really have to go down the rabbit hole of self-delusion to squeeze out the promised Christmas spirit. Unless of course, you are a member of a family, which has not been warped by this reality into a squinting cynic, and you really do have a jolly good time at every Christmas. Congratulations, you’re a better person than me or a character in a Christmas movie [yeah, I’m snarky when it comes to Christmas].

Anyway, I’m done talking about Christmas. I’m already looking towards the passing of 2011. It’s passing excites me and I’m scheming what to do with the whole of 2012, when that tiny New Year’s moment elapses, when December 31^st shifts into January 1^st. Unlike most people, I don’t view New Year’s Eve as an excuse to consume alcohol with reckless wanton, though I see it too often among my peers, which I’m sure is common, since New Year’s Ever has been the biggest party in the calendar since I’m old enough to remember, but to me New Year’s the time to shed a skin you don’t need, leave yourself pink, fresh, with nerve endings naked and virginal, but heeding the lessons of past years. It’s a restart button on a simply calendar level and I love it.

After I’ve read “Booklife” by Jeff VanderMeer, I think that I’ve been on the right track to get some general ideas on how I want the year to pass, but I’ve been missing the strategic element to bind my goals from year to year in a Master Plan, which will ensure that I reach my overall goals for a minimal amount of time. I’ve come to understand that knowing what you want is a lot different from knowing how to get what you want. So without further ado, I have drafted a five year plan and the achievements I want to have to my name. With that in mind, I’ve found a course of action to support these plans. It sounds all very general, but this is my warm-up post to a week of publicly stating what I will cut down on and what I will emphasize on come next year, because I believe that stating these goals to a broad audience creates a pact. If I’m to keep these goals to myself, I’m much more likelier to cheat [yeah, I’m a douche like that], but stating my intentions on the web will keep in line.

In general, I envision my 2012 to have more reading, writing and exercise and less TV, 9gag and unhealthy foods. It’s a scary perspective, hard to reinvent my personality type, but I don’t see myself lasting longer, if I don’t lead a healthier lifestyle, for the sake of my body and mind.

Do you guys make plans?  

[December 21st] Alternative Alamat edited by Paolo Chikiamco

I've been meaning to mention this anthology for about the better part of a month and have been failing to do so, but better late than never. I'm extremely lucky to have connected with Paolo Chikiamco, who is working hard to promote Filipino fiction through the anthology he's edited Alternative Alamat.

Since I'm a fan of mythologies, especially different, lesser explored mythologies, I have a copy of this lovely anthology to read and comment upon, which I hope will have some time in January.

While you wait on my words of wisdom, I give you the table of contents and official description:

Table of Content:

“Ana’s Little Pawnshop on Makiling St.” by Eliza Victoria

“Harinuo’s Love Song” by Rochita Loenen-Ruiz

“The Last Full Show” by Budjette Tan

“The Alipin’s Tale” by Raymond G. Falgui

“Keeper of My Sky” by Timothy James Dimacali

“Conquering Makiling” by Monique Francisco

“The Sorceress Queen” by Raissa Rivera Falgui

“Beneath The Acacia” by Celestine Trinidad

“Offerings to Aman Sinaya” by Andrei Tupaz

“Balat, Buwan, Ngalan” by David Hontiveros

“A Door Opens:  The Beginning of the Fall of the Ispancialo-in-Hinirang” by Dean Alfar

Description:

Philippine mythology is full of images that ignite the imagination: gods of calamity and baldness, of cosmic time and lost things; the many-layered Skyworld, and weapons that fight their own battles; a ship that is pulled to paradise by a chain, and a giant crab that controls the tides… yet too few of these tales are known and read today. “Alternative Alamat” gathers stories, by contemporary authors of Philippine fantasy, which make innovative use of elements of Philippine mythology. None of these stories are straight re-tellings of the old tales: they build on those stories, or question underlying assumptions; use ancient names as catalysts, or play within the spaces where the myths are silent. What you will find in common in these eleven stories is a love for the myths, epics, and legends which reflect us, contain us, call to us–and it is our hope that, in reading our stories, you may catch a glimpse, and develop a hunger, for those venerable tales. “Alternative Alamat” also features a cover and interior illustrations by Mervin Malonzo, a short list of notable Philippine deities, and in-depth interviews with Professors Herminia Meñez Coben and Fernando N. Zialcita.

[December 20th] Anthology Projects Worth Your While

That's how my brain feels like at the moment

As I'm gearing up to switch from academic to creative writing, I'm jotting some ideas for short stories that I've been planning to write for the following projects:

1] Pandemonium: Stories of Smoke to be edited by Jared Shurin and Anne Perry: I've been following the critical non-fiction these two have produced on Pornokitsch to be confident that they know what they are doing and their first anthology has gathered some of the biggest rising names in genre to date, which in its own is one hell of a feat.

Coming in spring of 2012, Pandemonium: Stories of the Smoke brings you London as you've never seen it before - science fiction and fantasy in the great tradition of Charles Dickens.

Charles Dickens lived and breathed London in a way few authors ever have, before or since. In his fiction, his non-fiction, and even his own life, Dickens cast an extraordinary shadow over the city he so loved - so much so, indeed, that his name has become synonymous with a certain image of London. A London of terrible social inequality and matchless belief in the human potential; a London filled with the comic and the repulsive, the industrious and the feckless, the faithful and the faithless, the selfish and the selfless.

This London is at once an historical artifact and a living, breathing creature: the steaming, heaving, weeping, stinking, everlasting Smoke.

2] Bibliotheca Fantastica to be edited by Claude Lalumiere & Don Pizarro: Dagan Books impressed me with their Cthulhurotica anthology, which will delightfully be continued come next year, and Lalumiere has been hailed as a force in the short form, so I wish to be involved hopefully as a contributor.

What we want: Stories having to do with lost, rare, weird, or imaginary books, or any aspect of book history or book culture, past, present, future, or uchronic. Any genre. Although the fantastical is not essential per se, stories should evoke a sense of the fantastic, the unknown, the weird, wonder, terror, mystery, pulp, and/or adventure, etc.

3] Fungi to be edited by Orrin Grey & Silvia Moreno-Garcia: Creepy mushrooms in an anthology produced by one of the key authorities on creepiness. Yes, please. 

Orrin Grey and Silvia Moreno-Garcia tackle the darkest of all horrors: fungi. William Hope Hodgson’s “The Voice in the Night” and its Japanese adaptation, Matango, terrified and fascinated the editors. And now, they’re back for more.

Fungi is an anthology of dark speculative fiction (horror, fantasy, science fiction, and any other variant, such as steampunk) focused solely on the fungal. No happy mushrooms from Mario Bros. A fungus of some type must be a key element in the story, not just a throwaway element. A character can attempt to poison someone with a mushroom, mushroom cultivation may be of importance to the story, the dark patch of mould on the ceiling may begin to terrify an unhappy tenant, a group of people may consume hallucinogenic mushrooms, etc.

We are looking for a variety of settings and protagonists. Mushrooms sprout around the world, after all.

4] The Worldbuilder Project inspired by Empire State written by Adam Christoper: Technically not an anthology in the traditional sense of the word, but I think it can be fitted here. The project itself can lead to a potential inclusion into an anthology, which is always a bonus.

[December 19th] Ready, Set, Edit

Somehow, I will always consider editors and writers in editing stages to be this in real life. I mean, not evil and mindless in their rage, but at constant war with mistakes in manuscripts.

I've had Crimson Anatomy [previously known as Crimson Cacophony] out to beta readers and I've received some feedback, which suggests that a lot has to be changed, both big and small. I thought that readers had to be informed about certain physical transitions, which now I realize I overdid and will have to tone down, if I'd like to avoid any annoyance on the part of the reader.

I was aware at the time that some aspects in the novel would need to be fixed, but I also knew that my perspective on the novel has shrunk to what was on the pages and not how it could be altered to support the ideas expressed on the pages. What this feedback has managed to show me is that everything has to have its purpose to be written about, within a scene, then within a sub-plot, then within the work as a single, whole work of art. Now I know these things in theory, but I learn best by doing something a thousand times wrong, which has happened here. 

Now I'm ready to tackle this beast, again. I'll write a synopsis of the new draft, hopefully the final one in terms of big changes and then read the manuscript to make notes and then I shall invoke the Red Pen's power: 

"On manuscript's pages white

no error shall escape my sight.

Flee, for tis not how I write.

Succumb to Red Pen's viscous bite"*

* - Any similarities between this little rhyme and anything that or may not be a pop-culture icon are purely coincidental.

[December 18th] Art based on American Gods

In January, I did a  post about art based on books, the example being One Flight over A Cuckoo's Nest and I have been thinking about how different mediums can recreate a single work of art, which in this case is a book, through the whole year. I like the idea of connectivity between arts; how books can inspire art can inspire music can inspire film can inspire sculptures. Above all, I have been meaning to find more fantastic art that recreates a popular book. This time I have struck gold with Neil Gaiman's "American Gods".

The novel itself is extremely visual and well suited for the following illustrations below. What novels would you like to see represented with art such as this? 

[December 17th] Interview with Zoran Živković

I've stumbled upon on this brilliant, long and informative interview of Zoran Živković, which you can find on World Literature Today. I've managed to finish part one and so far it's revealed a lot about the literature in Europe, a field, which is quite murky to me. I hope you find some interesting tidbits for yourself as well. 

[December 17th] Miranda Rights in Downton Abbey?

This week proved to be one of the more exhausting variety and I found myself season two of "Downton Abbey", which I find as one of the best period shows I have watched in a long while. The writing is smart, the characters interconnect well enough to keep me watching and there is character growth, which I found overly enjoyable. Edith has become one of my favorite support characters in the series. 

As entertainment, "Downton Abbey" stands on its feet and achieves a lot with the typical British eight-episode season format compared to shows with twice as many episodes per season. However, I can't be entirely sure of whether authenticity is handled in the same way. Now, I don't know about how society operated, how all the different circles in society interacted with each other or how Britain's institutions structured and exerted control over the population during and after World War I.

What I do know is that members of the police force did not use the Miranda Rights during an arrest, which did happen in the season's finale, when two men, who looked like detectives more than officers, arrested Bates for the murder of his wife Vera. The scene itself possesses enough inherent drama to create a strong emotional response without there being any need for the officers to speak, much less use an antiquated version of rights, which were accepted as police procedure during arrests in the late 1960s in the US.  

I try to rationalize as to why they were included. Everyone can relate to the severity of an arrest, so there is no need to evoke sympathy from the viewer by using a popular device for creating tension in modern cinema and TV. I assume that this is an oversight, but one that I find harmful to the suspension of disbelief. I'm only mentioning it because this simple detail derailed the whole experience in that scene.

Have you had similar moments, when watching shows or enjoying movies?